A traveling salesman checked into a futuristic motel. He needed a haircut before his next day's meeting, and he called the desk clerk asking if there was a barber on the premises.

"I'm afraid not, sir," the clerk told him, "but down the hall is a new machine that should serve the purpose."

Skeptical but intrigued, the salesman located the appropriate machine, inserted fifty cents, and stuck his head in the opening. The machine started to buzz and whirl. One minute later the salesman pulled out his head and surveyed his head in the mirror, which reflected the best haircut he ever received in his life.

Adjacent was another machine with a sign that read, "Manicures - 50 cents." "Why not?" thought the salesman. He paid the money, inserted his hands into the slot, and pulled them out one minute later perfectly manicured.

The next machine had a huge sign that read, "This Machine Provides What Men Need Most When Away from Their Wives - cost 50 cents."

The salesman was embarrassed, but he had been away from his wife for two weeks. He looked both ways and saw nobody around so he put in fifty cents, unzipped his pants and stuck his penis into the opening. When the machine started buzzing, the guy let out a shriek of pain and agony.

Fifteen seconds later the machine shut off and, trembling, the salesman withdrew his penis.... It now had a button sewed on the tip.